ALIVE​:​ness

by Mad Kate | the Tide

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03:14
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01:25
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credits

released October 25, 2013

ALIVE:ness
Berlin, Milan 2013
Mad Kate - vocals, text
Jacopo Bertacco (the Tide) - guitars, loops, electronics

Pancho Ragonese - piano on "dream about dad"
Tommaso Fiori - analog synths on "digital age"
Eva Thorp - voice clip on “exactitudes of our passion”
recorded,engineered and mixed at Tideofsound HQ Berlin
tideofsound.net
Mastered by Gregg Janman at Hermetech Mastering Milan
hermetechmastering.com
Special thanks to Eva, Sarah, Juan, Adrienne and Ravi

all rights reserved Mad Kate | the Tide
tideofsound.net/mad-kate-the-tide
booking: madkatetide@gmail.com

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all rights reserved

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about

Mad Kate | the Tide Berlin, Germany

Mad Kate (vocals text movement) and the Tide (guitar loops electronics) collaborate in a perpetual adventure pet that touches the multiplying ways we access music and performance. From electro-folk to Afro-noise to punk-word, they speak with an urgent voice as they explore the concept of ALIVE:ness. ... more

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Track Name: golden voice
I had a dark thought sitting there
Perhaps it would be right
Perhaps it would be just right
If today you died like this


I was born like this I had no choice
I was born with the number of the golden voice

It is nice not to speak
Sometimes it is just right
I don’t want you to think
That today you’ll die like this
Track Name: digital age
Ain't no point in fighting
the digital age!
like saying why u drivin fools why take a plane
it's just a storm raging
ain't no stoppin the times
man
Naked god at glowing faces
not really knowing the particular places

staring at our phones at our pictures
--before we left em’
we might not even elect them
muddle up the end the future

huh huh

now to the next best human
connect to your neighbor in cyber space
it might not be physical,
your brother—the one you never call

imaging them on the edge of our future
the memories one more time
its not this place, the human race
its connected by my neighbor in cyberspace

there aint no point in fighting! (3x)
the digital age…..

naked god at glowing faces
not really knowing the particular places

look it up on facecrook try it for good
the Afghani you never LIKED
the world this way in time is traced
happening now in cyberspace

aint no point in fighting (3x)
the digital age

don’t fight it!
Track Name: dream about dad
So I never got to tell you my dream about dad … yea, he was at this party and, um, I think it was a math department thing or something. Anyway I was there with somebody I feel close to. I would think it would be Juan, but I don't know, it could have been someone else. And anyway I was, I was watching him. And I realized, i really love how he was when he was social, and he was laughing and his eyes were lit up. And i noticed that over time at this party he was ... morphing ... into different times, you know, in his own self. like at one moment he looked like he did when he was younger, you know, like in the eighties, i guess how i remember him from photos or something, and then in the next he was much older, like, before he got sick. and for one moment i kinda got jealous. and he said, katie its so good to see you! and then he threw his arms around me and gave me a big hug.
yea and then the dream was over.

And told you not to come and I told you not to come and I told you
Jealousy eats you alive makes you do what you don’t want to
Have you not heard what they’ve been saying?
What makes you think you’re not misbehaving?
Jealousy makes the world go round—that’s what they said
When they found her

Reading the book you sent i find myself looking for you on every page ... it's as though i could feel you through the words that you've underlined ... like, if i touched the ink that touched your pen that touched your hand ... then i could pull you through the pages you've underlined. im greedy for every page you've dogeared. im fascinated by you. i want to imagine you reading; where do you read? i want to imagine which parts touched you the most, and maybe i can access you--your birth, your youth, your motherhood, your old age. your death. i'm ripe to access you entirely.
And told you not to come and I told you not to come and I told you
Unhinged!
Unhinged one is clear, unhinged we are broken
Our souls are blown open--to see and be seen
I'm fascinated with the hand that touched this pen, that left this ink
That I can touch with my own hand

Mother
are you alive?
Track Name: ALIVE:ness
Aliveness. We are caught with the strange responsibility of assessing ALIVEness. These people that claim to be alive or dead—to what extent do they have real aliveness in our lives? Their picture—staring out at us from the annals of the internet—just as alive or just as dead? That one—I know for a fact that she committed suicide but I hadn’t spoken to her in years. Has her ALIVE-ness in my life changed since her death? And my mother’s ALIVEness; has it grown stronger? My father’s ALIVEness; has it grown weaker, since his physical death? I am not sure. When I send a text message to my mother and she doesn’t call, or an email to my mother and she doesn’t reply, this makes me feel like she might be dead. After all, my father does the same thing, and he IS dead. Aren’t we, alive in these times, perpetually “reachable”? Reachable. Reachable. Reachable. Reachable. Reachable.
Track Name: exactitudes of our passion
You never told me that was a lie
You never said that was on the tip of your tongue
You had a chance and you were silent with me
You never told me what you said was a lie
Is PROGRESS the true understanding of your reality?
Is history collapsible into this moment
Minuscule?
You expect me to believe what you said?
I can't get that exposed.

I never said I was made of him
I never said I was made of him -- And incidentally I don't know
You never said it’s fair in love
Never had those doubts that somehow
I'd like to possess you in my flesh and bones
Cause I already do
Never said I was made of that
You never said that I was deep in your china cabinet
but I am
You never said I was as deeply alive as you
You never told me that was a lie
You never told me that tract of letters was a lie
Written in exactitudes of our passion for each other
You never said it was funny too
Never told me it was a disguise
You always want to make me laugh
It's so difficult to laugh
I wanted to but I laugh
About stupid situations fucked up miscommunications
What to say anymore
Last time I saw you
On the phone she said
She said it lightly and brightly as if to say
You never told me that was a lie
If you'd lived you'd understand in the text of your class
Track Name: spent so much time with your face
I spent so much time with you
I know all about you
I know when your birthday is
I saw you in your kindergarten class photo. You were wearing a polka dot dress.
I saw you with your arms around your first boyfriend. His ears kinda stuck out.
I know your aunt graduated from nursing school 'bout six months back.
You were giving her a big hug
I saw you and your friends at that Sushi Restaurant last night
Yea you looked like you were having fun
You caught a really big fish with your dad on that camping trip. I Liked that.
I spent all this time with you editing that footage. You were talking to me. I know all about what you think. You're so smart.
I spent so much time with those audio files. I spent so much time with your words. I really think you’ve got something worth listening to.
Yea, I’ve spent so much time with you!
I’ve spent so much time with your FACE!!!!

What I know about you is from the data I captured about you six months ago. Similar to how astronomers collect the light from a far distant star to try to understand the galaxy but it is actually taken four billion years to get there ... so it might be … yea it might be … oh it might be … A little late!!!!!

Spent so much time with your
spent so much time with your
spent so much time with your
FACE
Track Name: only one person
You --
You’re only one person
But I can make a robot
To look like me
You --
You’re only one person
But I can make a robot
To look like me
And be me
then I can be two--
Or three

Overcome by possibility
I sit in the middle of this continuum
(choosing porn over a rape crisis center),
one small window into a million lives
multiple life partnerships
a trailer in a dyke commune
an academic’s life in London
singledom in Mexico City
on the land in the desert
gas station hustler’s life on the road to Budapest.
rape crisis center in Detroit,
punk squatter freegan in San Francisco with you.

its a slap in the face
the impossible restriction of time
not all these lives can be truly lived by me.
Time is the limiting factor in the end,
And we must choose.
I’m grasping for the reason of being here,
And nowhere else
Even as I realize that this “radical circle”
is not at every front line.
The lives of farmers and shepherds,
some of them children,
taken by NATO drones.
Those lives go unaccounted for.
They are not “alive enough” for many of us to register.
We are not there,
standing next to them,
in place of them.

This life, that one;
a peep show in Germany
juxtapose soldiers sent to Iraq
sucking the cunt of a young queer liberated dyke;
we have made a space in this place,
temporarily unbothered by the wider web
because
if every life were really alive to us,
the depth of our mourning would be unending.
Track Name: bodies of flesh, bodies of knowledge
Bodies of Flesh
Bodies of Knowledge
Practice – getting naked – having sex

Bodies of Flesh
Bodies of Knowledge
Practice – getting naked – having sex
Removal – Exposure – Vulnerability
Develop heels into toughness
Of femme solidarity

Bodies of Flesh
Bodies of Knowledge
Practice – getting naked – having sex
Superficial—Markers—that fuel felt power
when love and intimacy
is the true vulnerability

Bodies of Flesh
Bodies of Knowledge
Practice – getting naked – having sex
Degraded –Weakened– Angry we turn
to righteousness
But fear to risk --

What can we imagine
In our mind’s eye
obsessed with ownership
Guilt and shame to appropriate?
Can we not imagine
A story we don’t have to own

We are all queer
We are all whores
We are BLOOD--
Disempowered by our flesh

Waitress
Stripper
Porn Star
Whore
And the world will never look the same

And the world … the world
will never
look the same!
Track Name: watchword eyes
One two watchword eyes
One two watchword eyes
Were you asleep child?
One two watchword eyes
One two watchword eyes
And a slingshot
One two naughty boys
Blood in their eyes
One two naughty boys
and a slingshot
One two naughty eyes
And you’re caught

One two watchword eyes
And a slingshot
One two naughty boys
On a park bench
Blood in their eyes

And the day was bright
Day was bright
Arms were open wide
Day was bright white light
Day bright white light

One two watchword eyes
On a park bench
No no no I don't see it in their eyes
One two naughty boys
Day bright white
Day was bright,
bright white light
Arms were open wide
One two naughty boys on a park bench
Day bright white light

Day was bright
Day was bright white light
After the blood lines left their eyes.
Track Name: the ALIVE valve
The dream I had the other night
Peeling off the layer of bubble plastic stuck
so Deep into my feet
so Deep I could see all the sinew
the muscle and tissue inside my body.

I stared so Deep inside my legs
Overcome by my own humanity.

I was staring up at the black plastic just
Hanging from the ceiling
Oh, with just an ALIVE valve at the bottom
An ocean was inside me.

Well, I'm just this plastic bag of fluid
with an ALIVE valve at the end.

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